For the record, I am more than willing to state the fact that I am a very curious person who is almost always willing to try something once, even if nearly everyone I know thinks I’m ridiculous for doing so. So I’m trying out a little experiment.
It started about a year ago with my very own Craigslist ad. The kind where I say that I have adorable curly brown hair and a no-nonsense attitude when it comes to grammar, but nothing like the ads that George Blott told us about here. The replies came in waves. There were the usual penis shots and overused poetic clichés mixed in with the bad spellers, all of whom got the same amount of respect in my books, i.e. not much. Then there were the surprisingly semi-decent replies that I couldn’t be sure about because they really could have been from anyone (e.g. a murderer, one of my exes). That’s the problem with e-dating: no matter what you think you can tell from someone’s emails, no matter how many go back and forth, it’s always the in-person meet-and-greet that seals the deal.
Sadly, I usually only need a few minutes to figure out whether or not I’m wasting everyone’s time. I even once almost walked right by a potential date and just gone straight home because I could tell before even crossing the street that he wasn’t my type. But I went through with it, and had one of the worst quasi-dates of my life. Through Craigslist, I met ex-convicts and really boring boys who still live with their parents in St. Leonard. Since nothing was getting more exciting than that, I thought I should change it up a little bit.
So now I’ve taken things to a whole new level: I’ve joined OkCupid, an online dating site. And as much as I claim that it’s purely for socio-anthropological research purposes, it’s also to satisfy my curiosity about whether or not real people can actually meet other like-minded, intelligent, non-creepy people through online dating sites.
I know that people with lower standards than myself can have a field day on such sites, but I wonder if we semi-hipsters can make a date of it as well. Because really, when you cut out the poor spellers, creepers, 56-year-old non-sugar daddies versus the 19-year-old D&D fans, you’re not left with very much. So far I’ve managed to “run into” four people I already know on the site, while only finding a handful of eligible bachelors who I’d actually consider to be worth my time and effort.
So for the moment the verdict’s out. One of the perks of OkCupid is that you can see who’s looked at your profile and then size them up however you like. And I learned how to block the overly-enthusiastic people who can’t take my lack of a reply as a hint. There will have to be some real-life meetings in order for me to rate this dating site against the wonders of Craiglist personal ads, but don’t worry dear readers, I’ll keep you posted.
Tragically Unhip Staff
MP*erron
Kimberly Senf
Laurin McNiff
David Fiore
Poppa John
Tess Hart
Brooke D.
Elli S.
Meagan Burbidge
Mr. Flint
George Blottttt
Little Evie
I just wanna say that one of my roommates met her now-fiancé on OKCupid last summer, so that site works. Keep that in mind.
Regardless of which site you use, any online dater should look their date up on TrueScoop.com before even considering meeting them in person. TrueScoop allows you to do free public record searches on people. That way, you can figure out if your future McDreamy is actually a rapist or robber in disguise
“But then I think about Craigslist, about all those howls and barbaric yawps. I think about the needs they express—for sex, for companionship, for the companionship that comes along with sex and the sexuality that we hope for in our companions (and really, I wonder, how big is the difference between just wanting to make someone smile, and wanting to make a sloppy woman experience pure and total ecstasy within?)—and I try to imagine this humming undercurrent of need as the grid, the binary matrix of ones and zeroes that underlies the colorful, orderly, brightly-lit spaces of the mainstream online dating world. I like to think of it as gravity, as the subway under the city: a hidden, propulsive force that eventually moves the best of us to the places we were too laid back to know we needed to be.”
http://nplusonemag.com/scattershot-desperate-and-sleazy
If you are tired of wading through all the losers, a new website, http://www.onlinedatedelivery.com, will do that for you for a $19 fee.
i am on okcupid, had a few bad eggs, but i’ve found my boyfriend on that site, and i love him to bits. i like okcupid because it’s so low-key, free, and all the quizzes are interesting. good luck. :-)
Anyway, you have an interesting perspective on this this particular topic. I’d love it if you updated your blog regularly! By the way, can your readers to submit to you topics they want to personally ask you about? Actually I have a question on this issue since I am going through a tricky situation with a woman I have a crush on and I am not sure how to move forward. I’d love to get your input…or maybe someone can suggest a book that I ought to read?
I find this refreshing. I stumbled on this site while researching a bit and will surely visit back. I’m into dating, well, not litterally since I’m married, but rather in an academic sort of way. I find it a fastinating subject, and also enjoy reading what others have to say about it. I’ve never been a success myself, but I did find somebody.. on-line, the perfect somebody and am now happly married. For those still in the game, good luck too you. Umm.. sorry for rambling.. anyhow, I will check back often.